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Happy Deathday

Fact: we’re all going to die one day. I’ve always thought it would be neat to die on my birthday. Well not really neat, but at least tidy. What can I say? I like circles, even numbers, and no loose ends. It would be only one day for people to remember.

Jerimiah and I hope to die together, so I’m not sure how this would affect things. Then again, maybe he doesn’t care much about going out on his own birthday, so mine is fair game.

The only problem is, he wants us to both go out in a plane crash. That is simply way too much time to think about the fact that we’d soon be reduced to human pancakes. Hasn’t he seen The Notebook? What’s so wrong with holding hands and falling asleep together?

Actually, my preferred method for our demise is drive-by shooting. With the same bullet that curves through the air, like something out of the movie Wanted. We’d be the collateral damage, of course. But at least we’d meet our end while being together. We probably wouldn’t even see it coming. We could also save the life of the intended victim. I’d say it’s a win all the way around.

So maybe on my 98th birthday, we’ll avoid the airport and instead, my 99 year-old-husband and I will enjoy a picnic lunch in the worst part of town.

How would you like to go out?

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  1. Laurie Dodd

    Funny, Beth!

    • beth

      Thanks Laurie! 🙂

  2. I love your morbid imagination! 😉 I’ll probably die young, trying to help someone else. Or in a car accident. In this area, that’s highly likely. But it’s okay, I don’t want to live to be super-old anyway.

    • beth

      Thanks for playing along! From now on, I’ll picture you with your very own superhero cape. 🙂

  3. It may be weird, but I’m PUMPED to comment on this post! I’ve given this topic a lot of thought and its nice to know I’m not the only morbid person who plans out their death. =D

    Here’s how I want to go out:

    1. I want to outlive Kelly. I want to preach her funeral. I want to carry her, love her, walk with her, take care of her and look after her all the days of her life.

    2. Driscoll said that he wanted to preach his own funeral. I think that’d be cool. Picture it: You have your coffin on stage. All your family, friends & the church gathered together. You preach, then climb in your coffin, close the lid, and tell Jesus everyone said, “hey.”

    3. I told Kelly that if I happen to die before her, I want her to take my body to the Roman Colosseum, prop me up with a sword in my hand, and set a lion loose to devour my corpse. Then she can go around telling everyone I went out like a gladiator! She tells me I romanticize the idea of a gladiator’s death… I don’t know what she’s talking about. ROAR!

    • beth

      I was laughing so hard at #3 that I nearly spewed diet Mountain Dew from my nose. I’m pumped that someone else has given such thought to their death as well! Love it!!! Thanks for sharing. (And awwwww to #1!)

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