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People might envy that I am a writer. I have a flexible schedule. I am my own boss. Daily showers and social interactions are optional. Underwire is not required.

Seems great, right? It is. Only…I actually miss having a boss. I’ve had some terrific ones over the years.

Some thought we were sisters; others thought we were friends. They were only wrong about the first one.

The Cutie Pie Pageant contestants were a collection of heterosexual business men raising money for local children's charities. My boss made an atrocious woman. He loves his wife, his triplets, and sports.

But it’s more than that. My boss was the person I went to for direction. (I, for the most part, take direction well. Unless it’s something I desperately don’t want to do—then mulish tendencies take over.) I looked to my boss to confirm I was doing my job correctly. My boss would give the final verdict on confusing issues. Basically, the buck stopped with my boss.

But I have no one instructing me how to get the job done. No one to ask if what I’m doing is the right thing or the wrong thing. It would seem the buck now stops with me. And I don’t like it.

I often whine about this issue to God.

“Did you forget I’m your boss?” God asks.

“Well I know you are, technically speaking.” I say. “But I need someone to tell me exactly what to do and how to do it. Quite frankly, I feel like You’ve dropped that ball.”

He clears His throat. “Fall in love with Me.”

I roll my eyes and sigh. “Yes, I believe that’s why I quit my job—so I could write about falling in love with You.”

He replies, “Well are you just writing about your recent experiences with Me, or are you actively chasing after new ones?”

Everything in your Christian life, everything about knowing Him and experiencing Him, everything about knowing His will depends on the quality of your love relationship with God. If that is not settled, nothing in your life will be right. – Experiencing God, Henry Blackaby

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  1. I can relate! I’m less a boss, a schedule, and sometimes a paycheck. God’s also mentioned to me that counting on him is a good idea. I just wonder if he knows how hard that can be some days. 🙂

    Experiencing God is my all-time favorite Bible study. Thinking back, it was life- and direction-changing, though I didn’t realized it at the time.

    Thanks for a good one, Beth.

    • beth

      It’s nice to have someone who can relate!

  2. Donna Barton

    Love me some Blackaby! Def changed my life and walk…

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