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Bear, Bugs, & The Fonz

Dear Luca, Nafey, and Leah,

We normally don’t like girls, but Leah was pretty cool when she played with us last summer. It’s been 365 eons (or days as you call them) since our last letter. The gang’s all still here and we’ve even made some new friends. Mr. Potato Head’s cousin is weird though. He only answers to Bumble Spud.

spud wars

Maybe his weirdness is catching, because Wall-E started “channeling his inner Finnick.”

Winnick

But we actually wanted to talk to you about your Auntie Beff. She’s … well … not quite right. Since we’re in the same room as her, we hear her talk out loud a lot. But we don’t think she’s talking to us. She mentioned getting a “real job” if she can’t make a go of this “book thing.” And then, this morning, she grabbed Bear and ran out of the room. She brought him back wet, covered in snot, and dejected.

Bear

This is the only thing he remembers hearing her say (she was squeezing him so tightly he blacked out): “What hurts so bad about the thought of getting a normal job is that it would be normal. I thought you had more for me.” Again, we’re not sure who she was talking to, but figured we would try to help. Since Bugs is way more industrious than the Energizer mascot, this is his strategy:

Bugs

The Fonz believes glasses are the key to learning how to read. That way he can leave a review of his own. We don’t have the heart to tell him his arms are too short for the keyboard.

The Fonz

The Debutante, however, refuses to lift even a paw to help. Apparently she’s nursing a grudge, dating back to the last century, against your Auntie Beff. Something about getting stuck in a locker and being laughed at. Women.

The Debutante

Well, that’s it for now. We hope the three of you are having fun without us. But not too much fun.

Love,
Auntie Beff’s Toys

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  1. The Husband

    I love it. I think it’s incredible. Good job. 🙂

    • beth

      Thank you Husband. 🙂

  2. Allison

    Beth, it sounds like your toys support you enough with “the book thing” to reach out to your family for an intervention. Lol all jokes aside, it’s clear to me that God’s real job for you is to write (and speak) about what He’s been teaching you. PS: the bunny owes me a hop since I wasn’t aware of that option.

    • beth

      Allison, good point! I do have some really great toys. 😉 I’ve told Bugs about the hop he owes you. He’s raring to go …
      Thank you for speaking into my life.

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